Friday, March 25, 2011

Naughty Kitty Lessons- Day One

Welcome to your first class of Naughty Kitty Lessons




I, Blair will be holding Naughty Kitty Lessons on Fridays, there will be 8 lessons to attend
and after you have completed all lessons you will obtain a certificate to post on your blog or to print out and hang in your office.



Now then for our first lesson we will be covering the basics;
  • bathing


  • shedding


  • meowing


  • scratching


For those of you wondering about my qualifications, one it is too late in the lesson you should have asked before joining my class and two talk to my mother.



Alrighty then lets talk about bathing, you should always bathe yourself when in company of lots of people and of course the flashy beast. I personally enjoy bathing when my Mom is laying in her bed, right next to her, snuggled up of course.



Shedding goes hand in hand with bathing if you bathe yourself enough you should encourage lots of hair shedding especially in the spring. You should always rub yourself on your humans when they are wearing white or black.



Meowing is a great tool to make your humans do as you please. If you meow enough they will do anything to make it stop. Always talk lots and talk loud even if you don't need anything.



Scratching should only happen on furniture, bedspreads, and on your humans. You should always keep sharp nails just in case of times when you are being forced to go to the V-E-T or other such occasions.





CLASS OVER

Make sure you come back next friday for the next lesson

ps. stay tuned for an exciting post tomorrow!

10 comments:

  1. Blair, my two resident kitties have the bathing in public (leg up in air, privates exposed) down pat. Miss Darcy has not quite perfected this, so I will insist she attend today's class. Shedding is also a weak area for her. Her aunts, Bumby and Susie, however leave their fur everywhere and usually on my shirts - which I discover later when out with impeccably dressed friends and they ask what's on my shirt.

    Our Bumby has meowing down pat and saves her best for middle of the night performances or very early in the morning (preferrably out of pillow throwing range). Miss Darcy's mother informs me that Darcy sits on her chest every morning at 6:30 and meows in her face - so she's getting there.

    Will check in tomorrow. Ann

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  2. I think I can pass on everything except for the scratching. I only use my scratching post.

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  3. I like to wake my mom up in the morning with my meowing when I hear her roommates getting up. Mostly I am just looking for my brother meeko since we aren't together at night. And of course food!

    Darcy

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  4. We passed with flying colors! The Baby should get extra credit for shedding, Mommy swears she can shoot (and aim) her furs!

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  5. Does bathing include licking your, well, equipment? I am always told to cut it out by master when I do that. As for shedding, nobody does it better than the Pea.

    Slobbers,
    Mango

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  6. Will all of dat work for me's too? BOL

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  7. OOh, Blair - Muesli is going to be your star pupil!! In fact, it sounds like she's already studied your syllabus and course-books - she's already mastered the meowing and scratching bit...bathing in our house is not a DIY job though...oh no, we get REAL baths! We get WET, in the bathtub! Yes, Muesli too!!! :-)

    Slobbers,
    Honey the Great Dane

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  8. My kitteh sister Ellie belongs in the naughty kitteh club. It's got to be a tortie thing!

    woof - Tucker

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